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Thoughts on Idol

You know by now that I’ve had a little bit of drama in my life lately, and it’s been an emotional rollercoaster. Yes. But can I tell you what I’m seriously concerned about?

Who is going to be in the Bottom Three tonight on American Idol?

I think Matt and Allison are shoo-ins for the Seats of Shame. But I have to tell you – that third seat is concerning me a little.

I’m crazy about Kris. Danny makes my stomach get all knotty and my arms get all chill-bumpy every time he sings.

And Adam? Adam makes me want to take a very hot shower and scrub my skin with Borax.

Yes, he has an amazing voice. “Crazy control,” is what my husband says. But he’s just a little…um, freaky.

And here’s the really funny thing about Adam: I dost thinketh he can doeth no wrongeth.

It reminds me of a certain presidential candidate who was worshipped by the hell-bound, left wing media vultures. This particular candidate could, in his own special way, “sing the phone book” and still receive the highest praise. (if you know me well, you know my tongue is totally hanging out in my cheek)

Let’s consider this:

Adam: “Applegate, Angela… five-five-fiiiiiiiiive-seven-four-three-twwwoooooOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Barneeeeeyyyy, Paul…five-five-five-six-nine-one-oooooHHHHHHH!!!”

(wild applause)

Randy: Yoyoyo, dawg, that was HOT! Dude, you brought it to-NIGHT!”

Kara: Unbelievable. You’re like this amazing machine who can’t be stopped!

Paula: (weeping) Adam, you make my heart hurt. You shop in housewares and bring out the can opener.

Simon: (stands and claps) That was brrrrilliant.

That’s all I’m sayin’.

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