I know I said last week that my heart was full. And it was. But this week? Oh my freakin goodness. My poor heart is about to burst.
I’m simply stunned. Almost speechless. (Almost. Complete speechlessness would be an impossibility because I have oh-so-much to say.)
Last week, Michael and walked through the downstairs of our new house, the rooms vaguely shaped by tall 2x4s. We were thrilled, and we knew not to be fooled because framed rooms are actually a lot bigger than they initially appear. (Which is a good thing to know before you walk through your framed house, otherwise we would have had a lot of “oh crap” moments.)
Throughout the next week, the builders added the upstairs floor joists and rooms and outside walls. Last night we carefully made our way up the unfinished back staircase to the upstairs – veerrrry carefully since there were no actual steps, just the skeleton of a staircase. Once we made it up there…
Speechlessness sets in.
I see it. I believe it. But I can’t believe it. It’s unbelievable.
We’re really standing here? This is actually happening?
Next month will mark three years since we first met with our architect.
Three years ago, we put our ideas on paper. For the next three years, we looked at it, we imagined it, we mentally pictured it. Last night, we walked through it.
Crazy. In so many ways.
It was so much better than we could have ever imagined.
And it’s only 2x4s.
Just wait till we have actual walls and light fixtures and carpet.
I just may keel over and die from the overwhelmingness.
I couldn’t help but think about the long, frustrating, often painful road we’ve taken to this point. There have been a ridiculous number of setbacks and delays. Ridiculous. But through it all, we’ve learned that God is trustworthy. That His time is most often not our time. That His way is almost always not our way. And that is absolutely how it should be.
We still don’t know – much less understand – why this has taken so long. Why we had to endure so many frustrations and setbacks. Why we didn’t move into this house two years ago. But I think we have a deeper understanding of who God is, and we’ve learned what it means to trust Him – to open our hands, release our expectations, and willingly and obediently receive whatever it is He has for us.
It’s so much bigger than a dream house.
(And lemme tell ya, this house? Is BIG. Not quite sure how we’re going to keep it simultaneously clean. But the life lessons? Even bigger.)
I can hardly stand all the fullness.